A Night Out in Bideford Part 3
The last pub:
We have completed our mission and have landed at our final pub for the night. We’re squirreled and this is likely to be a very short visit unless we have gone somewhere where there is a dance floor. If there is a dance floor we can get into the beats and sway our bodies like complete losers. The quickie has been sunk, let’s get to the club. I can hear the beats from here and I am trying to resist getting my freak on and pulling out some funky dance moves.
Club:
That’s it then we are firmly in the zone. After standing in a queue and talking rubbish the wait was worth it. It appears to be full of other drunken one eyes, imagine my surprise. Now I feel obliged to act like one. As if I needed any form of encouragement. Can I be bothered to get a drink, or should I hit that dance floor? More than likely I won’t think of getting a drink as the tunes are pumping, but then I realise dancing looks slightly camp and I hate it.So that’s it really. All the way from being half drunk to acting like a nonse on the dance floor- that’s the night out. I have to say by reviewing all this I can say the best time of the night always seems to be around the merry stage but you’re always wanting more and more until you can’t physically have anymore. Is it worth it? ………
Kebab or Pizza place:
Now just as I thought of ending this masterpiece based on a true story, it wouldn’t be right if we didn’t include getting something to eat at the end of the night. This part of the night is not to be forgotten as your insides won’t be in the morning. If you left after kicking out time, then you could be waiting around for some time, as you will find all kinds of drunken idiots within the vicinity buying a variety of unhealthy, high cholesterol foods, which you wouldn’t dare eat if you were sober. As I said, this could take some time, but will only seem like a few micro seconds, as time becomes irrelevant at this point. Not entirely sure about the science, but for me consuming a greasy ‘bad boy’ makes me feel so much better the next day, so I am convinced it must absorb a large part of my alcohol- fuelled system – who knows???
Paul Johnson and Davey Snead